Tag: Girl Cars
Gayest Cars in the World
10. Mitsubishi Eclipse
Back in the hay day of the 1990’s was a time that the Mitsubishi Eclipse could be seen driven by males ages 16-32, and 8 out of 10 times it probably had aftermarket exhaust, intake, body-kit, or some other add-on to spice it up a bit. These days the Eclipse is dominated by teenage girls and middle-aged women alike, all of whom love the sexy futuristic lines of the body. Any guy who is driving this car better have it beefed up with something cool, like maybe a supercharger. Otherwise, the Eclipse is looking girly enough to come with a flower holder by the steering wheel like the VW Bug.
9. Toyota Prius
The Prius is one of the best hybrids on the market today, but for some reason Toyota decided to make this car look like a driving egg. We admit, it is very roomy and high-tec feeling when you are in there, you save on gas like its nobodies business plus you get to drive in the carpool lane. But would it kill them to make it a little sleeker or shorter? If they improve the look of this thing, maybe guys won’t catch so much heat from their friends when they make the purchase. Because it is so efficient, we will keep it towards the bottom of the gayest cars people can drive.
8. Pontiac Solstice
You won’t be seeing many Solsti (Sol-sty) on the road these days, but when you do it will probably be in West Hollywood or perhaps the Castro District up in San Francisco. Pontiac probably had great intentions when they designed and released this tiny two-door convertible, but so far it has bombed hard in the male market. In the female market, women are pushing for the Mercedes SL Class or BMW 3 Series way to often for the Solstice to gain any type of momentum whatsoever.
7. Toyota Yaris
The Yaris is one of those cars that you can’t really put your finger on when you see it driving on the road. All you notice is its goofy, small, corky nature. There is also usually a small, goofy, corky man in their mid to early forties driving the thang as well. If you want to see a rainbow of gay cars lined up like skittles, just take about 20 minutes next Sunday afternoon to visit your local Toyota Dealer. You are sure to find a few of the gayest cars on the road today (Rav 4, Prius, Echo).
6. Volkswagen Jetta
When you look inside of a Jetta you are probably going to see a hot girl, or at least one that is easy on the eyes. If the Jetta is white then those odds are increased by roughly 30%. If there is a guy driving this car, they are either gay or it is the best car they can afford, after all, the VW Jetta is quite reliable, luxurious on the inside, and gets decent gas mileage. Our experts attribute the gayness of the Jetta to its complete lack of any masculine features. The manliest thing about this car is the black or blue paint if you buy it that color.
5. Volkswagen Beetle
The fact that the VW Bug comes with a flower holder/vase thingy right next to the steering wheel says it all. We wonder what the moment looks like and feels like when a strait man buys this car and has to remove that little flower vase. It probably feels like a tampon is entering some type of orifice on their body. Interesting Fact: The odds of you finding a republican driving a bug is about 1 out of 10, as it has always been and always will be dominated by the bleeding heart liberal.
Fiat really does everything in their power to make their small and gay little car attractive to men. They tried to make a manly cool commercial with Charlie Sheen, but what they don’t realize is that nobody wants to be like Charlie Sheen. Even though the Fiat is one of the meanest and slickest looking of the tiny gay cars, it still looks very feminine and capsulish. Buyer beware, this car may help with parking and gas mileage, but it contributes nothing to your social life.
3. BMW Mini Cooper
Just imagine ladies, you meet a hot guy and everything is going great. You walk outside to his car and you are about to go back to his place to do the dirty, and he whips out his keys and there you are…standing in front of a Mini. If a car says a lot about a guy, then what does a Mini Cooper say? Just having to look at a guy all scrunched up in there is uncomfortable. If a manly vehicle to drive is a truck, then the Mini must be the exact opposite, the girliest. However, there are a couple models of gayness that beat this beauty out by a mile.
2. Smart Car (Smart Passion Cabriolet)
It might be smart for your pocket book and commute to work, but it is not smart for your sex life if you buy the Smart Car. Out of all of the little tiny cars, the Smart Passion Cabriolet has to take the bacon when it comes to the gayest looking one. Maybe it’s because it’s the smallest, or maybe because of it’s stubby little shape, but there is just something about this microscopic vehicle that makes you just want to stare at it and make you wonder what would happen if it were ever in a major collision.
1. Mazda Miata
The Mazda Miata is hands down the gayest car on the road today. There are probably makes and models that look the part a bit more, but for some reason the Miata holds a certain reputation that sets it in a league of its own. For whatever reason this splendid little dabbler has gained steam amongst females everywhere. Legend has it that when guys drive the Miata they become more emotional and have been known to do things that are absolutely illogical and crazy for no reason whatsoever.